As Nothing Ever Was

Nancy


Discarded
How he felt
Though nothing was ever discarded
Below

A cruel honor
To be
First

They searched
He knew why
He knew it
Futile
Devin wasn’t hurt
Lost
Devin was gone
And he
Was
Left

Dreams
He’d listened
Fancied himself
A part
Sharing
Not dreams to own
His heart knew itself
Bound
In stone chambers
Yet
There were tunnels
Ways
Below was not
A prison
Then

Self-pity
Forges thick bars
Great locks
For iron gates
And it might have happened
Bitterness
Anger
A community mourning
But not for him

He
Survived
Grieved his
Aloneness
Silent echoes
Familiar
To his heart
Since his beginning

He
Survived
Grieved his
Life
Empty of dreams
Life
As nothing there ever was

And

As
He might
Live
It


He survived


for H

5 comments

  1. Nancy, I just read this last night in the email you sent me, and I'm so glad you posted it! Your poems never cease to amaze me. "a cruel honour" ... love this. And the final few lines ... oh wow. Powerful stuff you have here, friend. I'm so glad to be a part of it! Thank you!!!!

  2. Michelle, you gave us the place...the home...the frame. My little efforts are HAPPY here, thanks to your creativity, and they are honored to be here, amidst your, and Carole's, amazing gifts to fandom. The thanks go to you! Nancy

  3. Oh Nancy,

    This is so beautiful! And sad as well. Makes me want to cry every time I read it and yet I keep coming back again. Such are the power of your words.

    "Discarded... a cruel honor to be first" It is so Vincent and reflects much of what we saw in him and of what he had to fight to overcome to accept and trust the promise of love, of belonging, that Catherine represented.

    Amazing!

  4. Thank you for your lovely words: "...to accept and trust the promise of love, of belonging, that Catherine respresented." How I wish I'd said THAT, Ann! You've brought me a smile of gratitude and a sigh for the beauty of your thought.
    Nancy

  5. "Self-pity forges thick bars..." Truly words of wisdom.

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